Randy Lands Kite Sponsor

This Fall Randy joined the Outer Banks Trip and brought along a paddle board. He’s typically the first windsurfer out on the water, but when the wind was light, he headed out on his paddle board with a kite folded up that he deployed once off shore.

When he wasn’t windsurfing or kiting, he headed out in his car, returned with shopping bags that he carried up to his room & closed the door.

Of course we were curious, and asked Randy what he was up to. He responded “I’m advancing the science of kiting”. It was all very mysterious.

The mystery deepened when Randy sought out advice from Ted’s wife, Ruth, about sewing technical stitches that shape fabric with complex curves. He also spent a lot of time on his cell phone and said that he was in contact with a designer in Denmark - very strange. We suspended disbelief when we saw Randy trying out the kite that he put together after a trip to the Dollar Tree where he bought water-resistant fabric stitched together with Ruth’s sewing advice. Note the Go Pro helmet camera documenting his scientific advancements. It was all starting to make some sense.

Windsurfer's Documentary

We like to think we are doing good. But face it, driving to Lake Lanier in our vintage Hummer while snacking on chicken raised on Monsanto corn and tons of drugs while gripping our steering wheel wrapped in luxurious baby seal fur probably isn't doing the good we had hoped.

Many of you have met and know the work that Barrett Walker does regarding climate change. Another local windsurfer, Rhett Turner, has devoted an amazing amount of time to environmental awareness. He's just finished his third documentary, Secrets of the Long Leaf Pine, which will be broadcast on Georgia Public Broadcasting on Oct. 21 at 8 p.m.

Rhett and his partner, Greg Pope, spent two years on this project which focuses on the long leaf pine forests of the coastal Southeast. Once, a dominant ecosystem, it is just 3% of its original size. It's an incredibly diverse ecosystem, the most diverse in the northern hemisphere and only rivalled by the Amazon.

Secrets of the Long Leaf Pine

We were lucky enough to see an advanced screening. It's an incredible piece of work. It gave us a great appreciation for these forests and those working to protect these habitats. And, as Rhett jokes, "it has snakes!" It really does, the Eastern indigo snake, the largest indigenous American snake. It's a treat to watch and it will make up just a little bit for all those Keeping up with the Kardashians episodes you watched (we know you did, don't deny it).

It's also being aired in our surrounding states:

Alabama Public Television (APT) Wednesday, October 21, 2015 8pm CST
South Carolina Educational TV (SCETV) Wednesday, October 21, 2015 7pm EST
WFSU Tallahassee, Florida Monday. November 16, 2015 at 10pm EST
WFSU Tallahassee, Florida Sunday, November 22, 2015 at 2pm EST

For more info: http://longleafpine.org/

37th Annual Fall Classic Oct 16-18

37th Annual Fall Classic

Thirty-seventh. Let that sink in.

Something has to be special in the sporting world to be around this long. And, the Fall Classic is special.

It's not just about the windsurfing but the people who get together every year. Some people have been coming for a very long time. We are excited to see them and catch up. For others, it's their first time and we enjoy the chance to get to know them. The food and entertainment are always great, too.

Sometimes it is about the windsurfing, the spirit of friendly competition, a decent breeze. Other times, the wind doesn't quite cooperate so we take the chance to catch up with old friends, eye enviously somebody's new kit and just enjoy the wonderful view of the lake.

If you've thought about but the prospect of coming in last provokes anxiety, don't worry. We've done it more than a couple of times ourselves. You'll get more people cheering you on than the winners.

All the information and schedule is here : Notice of Race

and below

The Atlanta Boardsailing Club and Lake Lanier Sailing Club
invite you to compete in the

37 th Annual Atlanta Fall Classic

Rules– The regatta will be governed by the rules as defined in the ISAF Racing Rules of Sailing 2013-2016
including Appendix B- Windsurfing Competition Rules, the Class Rules of any applicable fleet, the printed Notice
of Race and the Sailing Instructions. The Sailing Instructions will be available at late registration/check-in at the
LLSC pavilion. Advertising is unrestricted.
Entry– The regatta is open to sailboard competitors. Registration will take place at the race site Friday night and
Saturday morning, October 16 & 17th. Please email the regatta chair if you are coming– voithphoto@gmail.com
Any group of 5 boards may compete in a trophy group including (but not limited to):
Open Unlimited • Sport (7.5 Ltd) • Kona • Formula

Letter to the Neighborhood

Dear Neighbors,

windsurfing yard Our yard last November.
wind altar
Religious item of our faith

This is [redacted] Jerk. My family lives at [redacted]. I am putting this letter in all the mailboxes in the street as it seems the easiest way to communicate with the neighborhood. I know that I have all your email addresses from the neighborhood directory but ever since the "Relive the '80s Party" fiasco which featured the regrettable Cosby Show marathon and my clever Heathcliff Huxtable costume, it seems my email is blocked by many of you. (Incidentally, was it that we served Jello Pudding Cups or had it catered by Subway that offended many of you? Personally, I thought the M&Ms in the dish labelled "Ludes" was a clever touch.)

Anyway, I'm writing to let you know that my yard may not meet our usual community standards for the next few months. Leaves may collect. The grass may go uncut. We'll do our best to get the paper and mail but we may be away in NC or FL for periods of time.

In past years, I know that many of you have spent much of October, November, December and January making frantic calls to the city, writing irate letters to the Home Owners Association and, in one case, calling cousin Tony in NJ to see if he can help out with a "situation". (Before anybody accuses me of unfairly stereotyping Italian-Americans, Tony does landscape work and, in a twist of fate, I highly recommend him if you are putting in hardscapes.)

To save you time and effort, I would like to remind you that I am a parishioner of the High and Holy Church of St. Monofilmus of Antioch and Cappadocia . In accordance with the rites of my faith, I devote my weekends in the feast period of Autumn to mediation and reflection on the water. I know that you, like most Americans, are tolerant and understanding of other faiths. I would like also to remind you of last year's contentious court ruling affirming my constitutional rights to practice my faith. Some media commentators disagreed strongly with that ruling and suggested further community action but we would like to thank those that resisted the urge to throw burning dog excrement onto our driveway. To those who didn't resist the urge, our dog knows where your yard is and we are feeding him left overs from La Azteca as I write this.

One of the many things that makes America great is how people of diverse cultures come together as a nation yet celebrate our individual cultures and backgrounds. So, in that spirit of freedom and especially religious freedom, if anyone wants to borrow my rake and leaf blower at any time in the next several months, please do so as I won't be using them.

Signed,
The Jerk Family

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