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February 2013

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Monthly Caption of the Week Contest 2

Submitted by maurice on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 09:42

It's time for another of our monthly "Caption of the Week" contests. The first one can certainly be considered a smash hit since our family dogs made up two of the handful of entries. We hope you all can step up to the plate and do a bit better this time.

The usual rules apply
- The captions need not be directly related to what actually was happening in the picture. No, the purpose is to think of re-interpretations, much like a revisionist historian.

- Of course, no disrespect is meant to those in the picture. Think of yourselves as actors in a performance; you are only playing the part of the character. However, there are no royalties, residuals or awards for your participation.

Here's this month's picture. Put your entry for the Monthly Caption of the Week in the comments below.

caption of the week contest 2

From here

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Being a webmonkey isn't so bad. At least I'm not windsurfing.

Shave

Submitted by webguy on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 11:37
Stimulating Shaving Cream Sales
We imagine it would have been difficult to shave with Farrah Fawcett staring at us. Our face would have been sliced to shreds by the distraction.

Life was a little hectic for us in late November and we missed this wonderful video from Guy Cribb. Being a bit younger than us and maybe not remembering the full glory of the 1960s-80s moustache, he enthusiastically participated in Movember. And, being a pro windsurfer (Cribb vs. Extreme 40), he chose a decidedly novel way to remove it in "two minutes".

The Shape of Things

Submitted by webguy on Tue, 02/12/2013 - 10:46
Throwing a sfit
Chubby Checker's dance that would ultimately inspire windsurfing sail design: The Twist

If you've been windsurfing a long time, you may have missed the subtle changes in sail design in the last few years. This is understandable, especially if you enjoyed the transition many years ago to "loose leach" sails. That transition was remarkable as sails gained significant performance advantages in range, stability and speed. It also allowed board shapes to change as the more stable center of effort meant that a board designer could concentrate the board's shape around the sail's COE and fin. This is one major reason why boards today are so much shorter and wider than the first generation of planing boards.

About fifteen years ago, sails became really good. Good enough that we weren't fighting the sail anymore, especially if the wind came up. Probably the other big change in that time was the rebirth of the large, no-cam sail. Notably led by Bruce Peterson's Sailworks and their Retro line, cams were no longer the necessary evil for a larger size recreational sail.

Dear Windsurfatlanta.org Part 34

Submitted by webguy on Wed, 02/06/2013 - 11:25

Throwing a sfit
See. There are worse things than getting skunked. You could be the guy on the left handing out the trophies. "Congratulations and please don't shake my hand."

Hoisting Silverware
Nice trophy. The ones at the Fall Classic are better.

It's been a while since we've published anything from our mailbag. Quite frankly, it may well because we get very little mail in the first place. Sadly, a fair amount of our mail begins as such:

ATTENTION BENEFICIARY,
WE THE WESTERN UNION URGENT REMMITTING OFFICE HAVE SENT YOUR FULL COMPENSATION PAYMENT OF $1.5million (One Million Five Hundred Thousand United Stats Dollars) TO YOU THROUGH WESTERN UNION, NOW WE HAVE SEND THE FIRST PAYMENT TO YOU.SO CONTACT OUR DIRECTOR DR ADO STANLEY, etc."

Despite our repeated correspondence with a number of Doctors, Reverends and Widows who have difficulty with English syntax, spelling and capitalization, we are still waiting for the proceeds from the lottery, estate or family trust smuggled from the new regime. Honestly, we don't see a way towards a new George Forman grill and flat-screen TV unless one of these good people comes through for us. Until then, we are relying on a title pawn on our 1997 Equipe II and the interest fees are killing us.

The following email hypothetically came across our desk and we feel compelled to respond:

Dear Windsurf Flowery Branch or whatever,
Who makes the decision about what pictures to post on top of your articles? The reason I'm asking is that I've seen emaciated male models, cartoon insects, fortune tellers. I haven't seen a windsurfer in some time. I'm beginning to wonder if anyone around here actually windsurfs. Judging from the pics, it's more likely they are playing board games.
Signed,
[Name Withheld but he wants you to know it was sent from his iPhone]

Dear Guy who has an iPhone,
We're not sure what you mean. We are windsurfers, not people who windsurf. As such, every picture has something to do with windsurfing because it's through the lens of windsurfing which we view life. Nothing has context unless it is displayed against the background of windsurfing. Windsurfing is our mother tongue - anything we hear, see or say must be said in it.

Okay, enough with the bad metaphors, let's continue. For example, as a windsurfer, when I see this pic: